.: I am :.


    The very first thing you will notice about me is that i am a FREAK. I am the person who just hates eveything and everyone around. The only thing i love is HATRED. I just love to HATE and to be HATED.

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    Bones and blood lie on the ground, Rotten limbs lie dead, Decapitated bodies found On my wall, your head!
    Modulistic terror, A vast sadistic feast, No emotion, Your flesh is all I need
    You have no choice of life or death My face you will not see, I'll rip your flesh 'till there's no breath, Dismembered destiny, As soon as life has left your corpse. I'll make you part of me

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April 10, 2007

my frustrations continued ….

Today, again i am thinking as if i have crossed all the limits of being frustrated. I don’t know what is happening to me but i just don’t like anything and anyone anymore. I don’t want to hang around with people, but, being alone, leads to the sad thoughts that are making me insane.

i feel like i am being betrayed in this life. i don’t know whom do i trust or rather shall i trust anyone? i do not know how to put an end to the bad dreams that i am having or shall i stop dreaming? i do not know how to put an end to what i am suffering from or shall i put and end to me itself?

i really can’t hold on to myself when i am stretched so far, and i am lost within myself and i cant make the right moves. But do i know making the right moves?

i keep on doing my daily things, i keep on meeting people, i keep on doing my work, but in the end i always end up hurting myself. And i want to know, why?

i know i have many questions in my mind, but when i try to find out what these are, i get lost somewhere. I get lost searching for the lost answers for the lost questions that i have. i am being killed by these questions like a cancer, and i feel i will find myself buried with the lost answers. Shall i go and take somebody’s help or shall i help me myself?

But who to go for help as i still have one question left: “do I trust some and get fooled by phoniness, or do i trust nobody and live in loneliness?“

(C) Freak


7 Comments

  • Comment by Anonymous — April 10, 2007 @ 3:07 pm


    WEll WEll

    You gotta find a chick whom you can spoil and once you do that you wont have much time to get frustrated.

    Good Luck


  • Comment by Anonymous — April 10, 2007 @ 5:23 pm


    well i would say, its a mix of both things man.
    N yeah i agree to above comment given to u. Just do it now.[:)]

    Besties


  • Comment by freak — April 10, 2007 @ 5:26 pm


    i would have loved to you know who you people are, you could have atleast posted ur name


  • Comment by Pratosh Dwivedi — April 11, 2007 @ 1:00 am


    fReAk ..
    No one can help u except ur very own self. Ppl will give advises, they’ll read ur blog and after an hour, they wont even remember what u wrote. This world is full of shit … u have to find ur way out … if u keep on waiting for other’s help … u’ll be waiting forever. To f**k with the world .. to F**K with luv, frndhsip and all other crap. We all live on our own and act according to our selfish ambitions. The sooner u understand this, the better it’ll be for you. And as always pApA is always there .. whether u need him or not … so just shed all this frustration anf f***k this world hard in its a$$.


  • Comment by Anonymous — April 12, 2007 @ 9:32 am


    Well…..well…wat to say…even …i have same questions and no body to answer…I hope u will help me out if u get any answer…but still man I m there to help u out any time any where.


  • Comment by Anonymous — August 23, 2007 @ 7:48 pm


    man, your a natural poet.
    im sorry your life seems so fucked up.
    Cheer up emo dude. every 1 has these crazy ass moments at least once in their lives.
    wgen you think about it, your life might not even bee that bad.
    then again it might be. i dont know.
    there are people you can trust, and people you cant. you need to be the guy who can depict the phonies.
    dude, get on with your life.
    get on a fucking roller coaster and just breath.
    let your mind go..
    Kasey


  • Comment by Fonceur — September 21, 2007 @ 8:58 pm


    I wont comment for this post rather i would quote from one of the movie i saw recently.

    Dwayne: I wish I could just sleep until I was eighteen and skip all this crap-high school and everything-just skip it.

    Frank: Yeah. French writer. Total loser. Never had a real job. Unrequited love affairs. Gay. Spent 20 years writing a book almost no one reads. But he’s also probably the greatest writer since Shakespeare. Anyway, he uh… he gets down to the end of his life, and he looks back and decides that all those years he suffered, Those were the best years of his life, ’cause they made him who he was. All those years he was happy? You know, total waste. Didn’t learn a thing. So, if you sleep until you’re 18… Ah, think of the suffering you’re gonna miss. I mean high school? High school-those are your prime suffering years. You don’t get better suffering than that.

    That is converstion between dwayne and frank in the movie Little Miss Sunshine


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